My life is so different now that my daughter has gone away to college. Here's just one example.
In the car the other day, Spencer and his friend Dakota were in the backseat on the way home from an AAU basketball game.
"So are you going to prom, Dakota?" I asked.
"I don't know. Probably." Dakota looks to Spencer and they both shrug.
Spencer, who has heard this question before, adamantly said no to prom about a month ago. "Why would I spend that much money if I'm not dating someone?" he asked.
Last week he said, "Maybe" lilting his voice up at the end, which means there's a girl he may want to ask, although he would die rather than tell me who.
My friend Stephanie told me her daughter's prom is in two weeks, so I asked the boys if they were running out of time.
"When is the prom anyway?" I asked.
They both looked blankly at each other. They had no clue.
Last year, the minute spring musical wrapped up, we were ankle deep in prom preparations. Dresses were chosen and shoes admired. Hairstyles considered and flowers ordered. The date, the group, the dinner, all were in order long before the prom tickets were printed. That's how it goes with girls.
With boys, the pace is a little slower.
I wouldn't be surprised if prom came and went with the boys not even noticing that it had passed. But I plan to pressure Spence a little bit to ask a girl his age, rather than the freshman and sophomores who flock around the upperclassmen; a tall girl who might not get to wear heals unless she goes with a tall guy like Spence. Okay, I already have a girl in mind who he was texting the other day -- not that it means anything. They all text each other constantly.
I imagine if he does ask someone, we'll be scurrying to find a corsage and to buy black dress shoes that will match his tux.
I went to the school website this morning and learned that the prom isn't until the middle of May. We have plenty of time -- in boy time, that is. In girl time, we would already be in panic mode at the lack of a date.
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